Teaching Girls to Think for Themselves: Helping Your Daughter Find Her Voice
As parents, we want our daughters to be kind, cooperative, and well-liked — but sometimes those wonderful qualities can make it harder for them to speak up when they disagree. The truth is, girls often feel pressure to “go along” with the group, even when something doesn’t feel right. That’s why it’s so important to teach them that just because their friends think or say something… doesn’t mean they have to agree.
This is where the Breadcrumbz come in! 💛 Samantha Sourdough, Penelope Pumpernickel, Rachel Rye, and Whitney Wheat each remind girls that it’s okay to have their own opinions — and that being assertive doesn’t mean being mean.
Why Assertiveness Matters
Learning to assert themselves helps girls:
Build confidence and independence
Resist peer pressure
Develop critical thinking skills
Form healthier friendships based on respect
When girls understand that they can have their own thoughts and boundaries, they are less likely to follow others into situations that don’t align with their values.
Simple Phrases to Help Her Practice
Encourage your daughter to practice assertive phrases aloud at home. This helps her use them naturally when she needs them most — without fear or frustration.
💜 “Friends don’t always agree, and that’s okay.”
💜 “I think I’ll just watch this time.”
💜 “You all go ahead, I’m fine.”
💜 “That’s your opinion.”
💜 “I can play the game this way.”
Practicing these statements in a calm, matter-of-fact tone gives her the confidence to speak up respectfully and stand by her choices.
The Goal: Emotion-Free Assertiveness
When girls learn to communicate assertively instead of reactively, they’re more likely to be heard, respected, and included.
It’s not about arguing or proving a point — it’s about knowing who they are and feeling strong enough to say it.
As the Breadcrumbz remind us:
“Confidence rises when you trust your own voice.”
By modeling calm communication and giving girls the tools to use their words effectively, we’re not just helping them navigate friendships — we’re helping them prepare for life.
For more information, read the book “Little Girls Can Be Mean,” by Michelle Anthony, PhD, and Reyna Lindert, PhD.
